GET OUR TIPS ON HOW TO FASCINATE EVERYONE WITH YOUR INTELLIGENCE IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS.
Brain? I wish everyone had one. For me, being smart has taken me to many places. Not the looks, not your status, but being smart and having a great personality. I want to share my tips for how you can be smart, look smart and act smart. And you know, that’s sexy!
There’s nothing sexier than a deep conversation between two intellects. What you say and how you act gives the first impression of who you are. It’s hard to correct a wrong impression so think how you want to present yourself. I’m being honest with you: I can’t stand stupid people. I walk out of a conversation politely but soon after I notice that it’s all about superficial subjects and isn’t going anywhere. Small talk is okay in some situations but I prefer to talk more about deeper subjects, even with people I’ve just met.
Great conversation skills have taken me to places I could never have dreamed of and I’ve met so many amazing, well-renowned people by just being real, interesting and smart. One of the greatest compliments I’ve gotten is that I’m a very smooth talker. But it hasn’t always been like that. I was a very shy child in some situations. Still, I understood that by being social you’ll meet interesting people and have new opportunities in life.
“I prefer to talk more about deeper subjects, even with people I’ve just met.”
Here are my tips for how to work your conversation skills:
1. LISTEN – Listen to what others have to say. Great speakers are also great listeners. Rude, selfish and unintelligent people don’t let others speak. Usually those types of people are the most insecure. They try to hide their insecurity behind a big ego. I have some rules that I follow when meeting people: Trust your intuition, pay attention to body language, RESPECT YOUR INTERLOCUTOR. Have strong opinions but let others have theirs as well. Pay attention to everyone who’s nearby and make eye contact. Ask questions, people love that!
2. GO OUT – Sitting home alone won’t get you anywhere. The prince charming doesn’t have your address… and new work opportunities come to those who have a lot of connections because relationships are what matters the most. My best tip to everyone developing their people skills or wanting to move forward in life: GO OUT AND PARTY! Yes, go to bars, pubs, clubs, festivals… We’ve met our biggest collaborating partner in a party that we weren’t even interested in initially. Luckily we went there, had our business cards with us (always carry them with you!) and we were so interesting that people wanted to introduce us to others.
3. TALK – You can’t improve your conversation skills if you’re sitting alone in the corner. If you’re alone at a party or by yourself in an event, go where the FOOD AND BEVERAGES are. Yes, I’m serious. You’ll enjoy all the treats before they run out and what’s best: you can talk about food! Open the conversation by complimenting the food to others and asking how they like it. After breaking the ice, ask how they know the host or how they got aware of the event. That will usually do it. And funny jokes.
4. HAVE A ROLE MODEL – Who is the greatest role model for you? I have many, and one of them is Marie Forleo. I watch her YouTube videos almost daily and learn so much from her, not just what’s in the content but how to speak, how to be an influential and energizing speaker who has important things to say. Find your idol, LEARN from her/him and become a great speaker as well.
5. TAKE COURSES – There are soooo many courses out there that deal with speaking face to face and in public. I have a diploma from high school where I took part in a rhetoric course. Even if I hated to speak for a bigger audience when I was younger, the practice paid off because now I’m okay with that. You should always go further from yourCOMFORT ZONE and improve your skills.
6. READ – Reading books, magazines, blogs and newspapers gives an educated and sophisticated picture of you. I’m proud to say I can speak politics, business, environmental issues, emotions, life and death, art and culture in general with whoever comes across. I’m not afraid to speak my mind when I know what I’m talking about, I have FACTS. And these facts are learnt by reading and educating myself.
In the end it’s all about the first and last impression people get from you. Learn a couple of good stories and jokes, dress stylish and chic so you get noticed, talk about subjects that are smart and inspire you. Ask a lot of questions and be interested in others. Challenge yourself to go out of your comfort zone.
Remember that being smart doesn’t mean you’re boring! I bet when asked about what kind of person I am, my friends would say at first that she’s funny, easygoing, she can laugh at herself and after that comes that she’s smart.
And you can be smart in so many ways. My way is to be socially smart and have a business orientated mindset. I have friends that are good in math, have studied science and law, who are running their own businesses. You can be shy and reserved and the same time really clever but you don’t want to show it at first. That’s so okay!
The point is, DON’T ACT STUPID, DON’T BE STUPID. I know some people get attention and publicity by playing the “bimbo-role”. They might be smart af but by acting like a fool or “easy”, they get attention mainly from men and other bimbos. Like that, you may get to places in life and meet cool people, but in the end, you’re just one funny party girl among so many others like you. Where’s the personality? How are you remembered when you’re 50…?
People. Go to libraries, museums, art exhibitions, opera, ballet, know more about history and politics. Use your free time wisely. Forget movies and TV. Go out. LIVE.
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